上海松江万达韦博英语学校的小编提醒你“晒娃”前应该问问孩子怎么想哦。

Recently, university researchers asked children and parents to describe the rules they thought families should follow related to technology.

家里人上网需要遵守什么规矩吗？研究者较近就这个问题分头询问了孩子和家长们的意见。

In most cases, parents and children agreed — don’t text and drive; don’t be online when someone wants to talk to you. But there was one surprising rule that the children wanted that their parents mentioned far less often: Don’t post anything about me on social media without asking me.

大多数情况，两者都能达成共识，比如：开车时别发短信；有人想跟你说话的时候别上网。但是有一条规则，孩子们的呼声远远高于家长：别不经过我同意就把我的事情发到社交网络上去。

As in, no pictures of them asleep in the back of the car. No posts about their frustration with their homework. That victory picture after the soccer game? Maybe. The frustrated rant about the fight you just had over laundry? No way.

所以说，不能发他们在车后座上睡着的照片了。因为作业而苦恼的事情也不能发。踢赢球赛时的胜利场景？也许吧。刚才因为洗衣服的问题跟孩子大吵一架，然后想在网上发点什么？别想了吧你。

The answers revealed “a really interesting disconnect,” said Alexis Hiniker, a graduate student in human-centered design and engineering at the University of Washington who led the research. She, along with researchers at the University of Michigan, studied 249 parent-child pairs distributed across 40 states and found that while children ages 10 to 17 “were really concerned” about the ways parents shared their children’s lives online, their parents were far less worried. About three times more children than parents thought there should be rules about what parents shared on social media.

这些答案揭示了一个“特别有趣的分歧”，亚里斯西斯·海内克（Alexis Hiniker）表示。她是华盛顿大学人本设计工程中心的研究生，也是此项研究的领头人。同密歇根大学的研究者一起，海内克研究了来自美国40个州的249对家长和孩子，发现10到17岁的孩子们“非常在意”父母在网上分享关于他们的事情，而家长们则远远没有那么担心。“晒娃”也该有个规矩：同意这个观点的孩子的数量是家长的三倍之多。

Sites like Facebook and Instagram are now baked into the world of today’s families. Many, if not most, new parents post images of their newborn online within an hour of birth, and some parents create social media accounts for the children themselves — often to share photos and news with family, although occasionally in the pursuit of “Instafame” for their fashionably clad, beautifully photographed sons and daughters.

像Facebook和Instagram这种网站，如今已经深深融入了现代家庭生活。就算不是大多数，不少父母会在孩子出生一小时内把新生儿的照片放到网上。为了给家人分享照片和信息，有些父母给自己的孩子创建了社交网站账号，当然也不乏有些父母希望把他们穿着时髦漂亮的儿女们打造成“网红”。

With the first babies of Facebook (which started in 2004) not yet in their teens and the stylish kids of Instagram (which started in 2010) barely in elementary school, families are just beginning to explore the question of how children feel about the digital record of their earliest years. But as this study, although small, suggests, it’s increasingly clear that our children will grow into teenagers and adults who want to control their digital identities.

在Facebook刚创立的2004年就被“晒”出来的娃们现在刚十来岁。Instagram2010年才建立，上面的时髦小孩们现在还没上。孩子们对于他们在互联网上的童年痕迹怎么看？这个问题才刚刚出现在家庭中。海内克的研究规模虽小，却指出我们的孩子正在逐渐成为希望掌控自己互联网形象的青少年和成年人。

“As these children come of age, they’re going to be seeing the digital footprint left in their childhood’s wake,” said Stacey Steinberg, a legal skills professor and associate director of the Center on Children and Families at the University of Florida Levin College of Law. “While most of them will be fine, some might take issue with it.”

“随着孩子长大，他们会注意到童年时期在互联网留下的印迹，”史黛丝·斯坦伯格（Stacey Steinberg）表示。她是法学教授，也是佛罗里达大学莱文法学院儿童与家庭中心的副主任。“大多数孩子对此没什么意见，但是有一些可能会引起争论。”她说。

Some children and teenagers question both past and present sharing. “I really don’t like it when my parents post pictures of me on their social media accounts, especially after finding out that some of my friends follow them,” said Maisy Hoffman, 14, an eighth grader who lives in Manhattan. “I worry more about my dad. He doesn’t always ask if he can post things, so I immediately turn away and ask if he’s going to post it. Or I’ll find out later because my friend saw something of me on his Instagram and I’ll have to ask him to take it down.”

一些孩子和青少年对于被“晒”存在质疑，不管是过去晒的还是现在。“我真心不喜欢父母在他们的社交网络上放我的照片，尤其是在知道我的一些朋友关注了他们之后，”十四岁的美斯·霍夫曼（Maisy Hoffman）说道。她住在纽约曼哈顿，正上八年级。“我更担心我爸。他发东西之前不会总征求我的意见，所以每次我都闪开，然后问他是不是要发到网上，不然我事后才会知道，因为我朋友会在他的Instagram上看见我的照片，到时候我只能让他把照片删掉。”

Other parents can also present a problem for the child who prefers to control how she appears online. Wendy Bradford, a mother of three elementary-school aged children in Manhattan, said that when parent chaperones took pictures during a third-grade field trip to the zoo, her daughter “hid when she saw the phones because she didn’t want the pictures to be posted on Facebook with her in them.”

有些孩子想要掌握他们的网上形象，对此，家长们也有苦水。温蒂·布拉德福德（Wendy Bradford）住在曼哈顿，她有三个上的孩子。她说当有家长陪着上的女儿去学校组织的动物园郊游时，她的女儿“看见手机就躲，因为她不愿意出现在她妈妈的Facebook照片里面”。

Isabella Aijo, 15, a high school sophomore in Natick, Mass., said, “I definitely know people who have parents who post things they wish weren’t out there. There was a girl in my eighth grade class whose mom opened a YouTube account for her in the fourth grade to show off her singing,” she wrote to me in an email. “Finally, on one of the last months of middle school, a peer played the song in class and almost the entire class laughed hysterically over it.”

在麻省纳蒂克上高二的伊莎贝拉·艾卓（Isabella Aijo）今年15岁了。她在邮件采访中说：“我知道好多父母发在网上的东西，当事人根本不愿意流传出去。我八年级班上有个女孩，她妈妈在她的时候在YouTube开了个账号，炫耀她闺女唱歌的视频，结果初中还剩较后几个月的时候，一个同学在班上放了那个视频，全班都笑爆了。“

Those early posts from parents linger, not just online, but in our children’s memories — and the topics may be things we don’t see as potentially embarrassing. The son of a friend (who asked that I not use her name) still brings up things she wrote about his picky eating when he was younger — years ago, she says.

这些早期被发布的内容不但在网上长期存在，在孩子们的记忆中也久久不散。即使有些话题我们看起来好像并不尴尬。我有个朋友（她要求匿名）曾经发布过自己儿子小时候挑食的事情，而她儿子很多年后还在抱怨。

But that kind of sharing — about food issues, potty training and tantrums — is exactly the kind of sharing that can be valuable. “Children benefit from the community created when parents have the ability to share their stories,” said Ms. Steinberg. Those posts about picky eating might have helped my friend find solutions, or a fresh wellspring of patience for a behavior her child would eventually outgrow.

但是这些分享，比如说饮食问题，如厕训练和发脾气，正是有价值的分享。“在父母分享孩子的故事的时候，一个社交群体形成了，孩子们会从中受益，”斯坦伯格说。她表示，这些关于挑食的分享也许能够帮助我的朋友找到对策，或者成为她获取耐心的源头，以应对这些孩子长大后就会克服的习惯。

When parents share those early frustrations, they don’t see themselves as exposing something personal about their children’s lives, but about their own. As a society, says Ms. Steinberg, “we’re going to have to find ways to balance a parent’s right to share their story and a parent’s right to control the upbringing of their child with a child’s right to privacy.

当家长们分享这些初为人父母的沮丧故事时，他们并不觉得是在暴露孩子的个人生活，而是在展示他们自己的生活。斯坦伯格说，家长有分享故事的权利，家长也有在尊重孩子隐私的前提下对于抚养孩子的掌控权。从一个社会角度出发，斯坦伯格说他们会找到方法去平衡两者。

“Parents often intrude on a child’s digital identity, not because they are malicious, but because they haven’t considered the potential reach and the longevity of the digital information that they’re sharing,” said Ms. Steinberg.

“家长常常干涉孩子的网上形象，并不是出于恶意，而是他们没有考虑到电子信息的传播广度和存在时长，”斯坦伯格说。

In general, said Sarita Schoenebeck, an assistant professor at the University of Michigan School of Information, who co-authored the research, both children and parents considered positive images, events and news more appropriate to share than negative ones. Parents can consider, too, the searchability and reach of the format (although those are always evolving). A frustrated tweet about a child who won’t eat her cereal because it’s not in a red bowl is a lot less likely to resurface than a YouTube video of the resulting tantrum. Looking for advice or sympathy about a behavioral problem? Skip both the image, and your child’s name, in a post to limit later searches.

总之，相比负面的信息，孩子和家长都认为积极正面的图像，事件和新闻更适合被分享，密歇根大学信息学院的副教授萨里塔·舍那贝克（Sarita Schoenebeck）表示。舍那贝克也是此项研究成果的合著者。她表示，父母可以考虑信息的可搜索度与格式的传播度（虽然两项指标都不断在进化）。如果一个孩子不肯吃麦片，只因为麦片没有被盛在红色的碗里。发一条沮丧的微博比发一段愤怒的视频更难被挖出来。如果要寻求解决孩子行为问题的建议？可以略过发图，和孩子的名字，让信息以后更难被搜索出来。

上海松江万达韦博英语学校：http://songjiangwandawebi.soxsok.com/